Social Rules

for private home meetings or play parties

The person or persons who own the premises where a Social is held, or who are hosting the Social, is referred to in these rules as the Host.

NE-DS members and guests can sign up for a Social.  NOT ALL SOCIALS ARE FETISH/PLAY PARTIES. Members can use the Store page on the NE-DS web site to pay using a credit card or debit card up until 48 hours before the Social.   NE-DS members who do not have internet access may pay by check, sent to the NE-DS mailing address; this type of payment must be received at least 7 days prior to the Social.   All sign ups must include payment.  Payments received later than these times may or may not be processed in time for the event.   No payments will be accepted at the door. 

While NE-DS members are welcome to attend any NE-DS social, the Host retains the right to refuse admittance to any NE-DS member or guests on the list.

You must RSVP, pay and be accepted, as discussed above, to attend a NE-DS social.   There will be no exceptions.  

Socials are for NE-DS members and their guests only.   NE-DS members and their guests must be at least (TWENTY-ONE) 21 years old.  NE-DS members must attend an orientation class in order to come to a Social.  Consent Forms or Liability Forms MUST be signed before you will be admitted to a Social.  No signatures, no entry.   There is a limit of 2 guests per NE-DS member at any Social.   Guests who come to 3 Socials must become a NE-DS member if they wish to attend future Socials.

Guests must arrive and leave with their sponsoring NE-DS member.  Sponsoring members are responsible for their guest’s behavior.   If one’s guest is asked to leave a Social, the member must also leave.   A member can lose his or her right to bring future guests if there is a problem with a particular guest’s behavior.

Directions to Socials will be emailed 24-48 hours prior to an event and only to those who have registered for the event.   Directions to Socials are not to be passed on under any circumstances.  If you did RSVP and pay for a Social and you haven’t received the directions within 24 hours of the time of the Social, please contact us at : https://www.secretary@ne-ds.org

NE-DS members and guests must wear street legal clothing, or be dressed in a manner that fully covers any fetish clothing, when arriving and leaving a Social.  There will be a changing area at the Social.  Unless otherwise specified, there will be no outdoor play.

The Host has the right to add or include rules that apply to his or her particular space.  NE-DS’ rules and any additional Host’s rules will be clearly posted around the play space.

The NE-DS Service Board has the right to change these rules.  Changes will be made to deal with situations as they may arise.  The purpose of these rules is not to limit anyone’s enjoyment of the Socials, but rather to insure the safety of all Social attendees in accordance with NE-DS’ philosophy for safe and sane play.  Existing rules, Host’s rules and any new rules will be clearly posted at all Socials.  All attendees at a Social must review the current Social rules and acknowledge that they agree to abide by them as part of his or her admittance to the Social.

A Social may have a different set of rules than you may use in your personal space.  Please keep in mind that these rules are here to protect all who come to a Social.  Please keep in mind we all set the example for newcomers to the scene.

Everyone has his or her own protocols (rules of behavior).  Please respect others’ protocols; they may differ from yours.  You don’t have to be able to do certain types of play at a Social that you can do at home.  If a scene is in progress do not interrupt.  Regardless of your urges to become involved: respect the players.

DMs will be clearly identified by wearing a NE-DS staff shirt or a red armband.  Only DMs or a Host can interrupt a scene.  Please get a DM if you question a scene.  If a DM or Host asks you to stop an activity, do so without argument.

Explicit sexual play such as (this is not an all inclusive list) fellatio, cunnilingus, vaginal or anal intercourse may be permitted at the discretion of the Host in an area designated by the Host for this type of play. Edge play is play that has a higher level of risk compared to other types of play (examples include, but are not limited to, fire play, some types of electrical play, blood sports, etc.).  Some forms of edge play may be allowed, subject to the approval of the Service Board and the discretion of the Host.  A DM can stop this type of play at any time if he or she believes that the play is unsafe or excessively risky.    If you have any doubt whether something you may want to do in your scene is considered edge play, please check with a DM prior to beginning your play.

The Host may ban certain types of play.  If the Host allows certain types of edge play that is acceptable to NE-DS, there may be an area designated for that type of play.  If you have any doubts, please check first with a DM.   Prohibited forms of play are scat, minors, animals, and breath play, where the bottom has no control over his or her breathing.

The NE-DS’ Social safe words are RED, which mean stop play immediately and YELLOW, which means to stop play and check in with the bottom (i.e. adjustment of straps or hitting too hard).

In any given emergency situation any person at the party has the responsibility to call 911 for Medical/ Law enforcement professionals.  Please notify the DMs and Host immediately.  Attendees are required to follow directions of the DMs and Host, and NOT interfere with rescue or law enforcement personnel.

Alcoholic beverages or impairing substances will not be allowed on the Social premise.  Anyone coming to a Social who is deemed impaired will be refused entry, and if needed, medical assistance will be called.

All play MUST be consensual to all parties participating.  If play is not consensual - immediately notify a DM or the Host.

Safe Sex practices MUST be used at all times at a NE-DS Social.  These include, but are not limited to condoms, gloves, dental dams and other barriers that prevent the unintentional spread of bodily fluids to other Social attendees.   This applies to everyone.  When people are at Socials, they are exposed to everyone else there, please protect your fellow guests.

You may see some play that you believe is not safe or makes you feel uncomfortable, please notify a DM or Host, so that they can check into the matter and handle the situation if deemed necessary.  A person should only step in when there is immediate danger to a person.  This includes speaking up if the Dom does not hear a safeword or there is significant physical distress or major medical need.

Should a Top need to leave the play space during the scene, bottoms are not to be left alone.  A Top may temporarily entrust the care of his or her bottom to another experienced person or a DM.  This is intended for short periods of time like a bathroom break or simple medical care or to get a forgotten such as getting water for the bottom.  That person can only hand back that duty to the Top or to a DM.  If the Top must leave the room for more than five minutes, then the bottom is to be taken out of restraints or poses, until the Top is ready to continue.

If you are unfamiliar with the equipment or the space, please ask a DM or the Host about it.  They will be happy to show you how to use it, or get someone knowledgeable to assist you.   If, in the DM’s judgment, he or she believes you are not experienced enough with any equipment or toy, the DM may stop the scene or limit the activities.

If this is the first time you have played with a particular partner or either of you is not very experienced, notify the DM.  This makes the DM aware, in case there are questions or issues later on. (i.e. a newbie screaming on a light or medium impact)

Carefully wipe down any equipment or surfaces that you use when your scene is over.  Cleaning materials will be provided.

Please note that those using floggers, whips and various other toys need several feet of space to operate.   Those playing should be aware of their proximity to others and those observing should give them plenty of room so that they are not accidentally hit or so that they do not interrupt a scene.

Respect people playing.  If you are having a conversation; please move to a social area so that you do not detract from the scene.

Respect Self, Stuff, Space and Scenes that are going on around you.

Soliciting or exchanging sex for money or other items, at a Social, is not only illegal, but will not be tolerated.  (If your scene involves fake prostitution - please let a DM know prior to scene.)

NE-DS strongly suggests people put their names on their bags and equipment.  This will cut down on the confusion of lost items or items accidentally taken by other people.  Please keep your toys and equipment picked up; this allows others more space to play and provides a safe environment.

Unless your scene involves food, please eat or drink in the social areas, not in the play spaces.

Smoking will be permitted in designated areas only.

Cell phones, cameras or any type of recording device is not allowed at a Social.  

No firearms are permitted at a Social.

Please be courteous to your Host; he or she has opened his or her home for you to come and play.  Please extend your thanks to the Host at the end of the night.